Farhat's Blog!

Badshah, I received your email, and if you think you can black mail me by your offensive words, dirty threats and lies, you are wrong. I am in different zone, and fear can’t remotely entail my life. You can say whatever pleases you without sending me threatening emails. Along that, please dig up the tiny skeletons of your sister’s illegitimate babies buried under the floor of the main room (it was Maqaddas’ room in 2002) in Jhang City. Give them proper burial instead of walking on them. Yes, Mr. Badshah babies who belong to your sisters, Bushra Fatima and the one who is Farrukh’s sister-in-law now. Let me jog the facts peer saab; they were aborted in the middle of the nights and buried in shallow graves in the bedroom by nobody else but your own mother, and the very next morning, your whole family walked over those tiny grave like nothing happened. A women in Pakistan don’t go full term with illegitimate children and then give them birth, neither they are accepted nor raised by their fathers who committed adultery in the first place.

Badshah, I’m sure you remember Gudiya, Munawar’s sister in law, with whom you had sexual relationship? At the end, when she asked you to accept the responsibility,  you simply backed off, and the responsibility of aborting the baby fell completely on her and her family just like it had back then when your sisters wanted to get rid of their so-called illegitimate babies. I could not have been so sure if I would not have heard your recorded conversation with Gudiya. You recorded the whole conversation in a manipulative way pushing her against the wall, and looking like it was all her fault from flirting with you to kissing you and then taking your clothes off. Later, when you told her about recording, she just vanished for the fear of dishonor and shame. Although she was in New York, she belonged to a Pakistani family, and you took advantage of this weakness. In 1997, when we visited Mumawar in California, his wife told me about Gudiya. She mentioned that Gudiya was married, but she can’t have children. Now, you know well for being in the medical field that abortion in primigravida (a woman giving birth first time) can cause infertility.

Few words for your family:
Badshah,  in Jhang, everybody knows when Abba Jaan arrived there, he had a “Khota Rerha……” I don’t think there is anything wrong with that, and you shouldn’t feel bad or lie about it, and certainly you shouldn’t judge others for what they do for a living. If you do, nobody cares, and certainly, I wouldn’t care less J. I do feel good when I look back for what I have accomplished, not in the form of money but in understanding life and nature, and differentiating good from bad. I would never surrender to evil or weak moments in this short life.

Back to your family, Habib Badshah had sexual relationship with Farzana, his colleague, Bau’s wife. He used to sleep with her in his wife Maqaddas’ bed in presence of his kids and all servants.
Before Habib was born, your mother had only girls and was desperate to have a son, so she said, “Allah, if you give me son, I will eat his poop.” Of course, she said in Punjabi,” Allah, je to men puttar deve te me odhe tatti khasan.” And, she did eat his poop. Habib Fatima told me this in presence of Tahira Fatima. (Tahira is the only person in your family who treated me like a human being, God bless her). Eating poop only shows how ignorant was the women who raised you, I and lot of other people can see the product in form of you and Habib. You could have taken the charge and had your shit together, but you chose not to.
Whenever we visited your family in Jhung, you used to sleep with your mother in separate room, and I slept alone with sick kids in the room far from the main bedrooms.

Badshah not everybody can snatch kids from a mother like a vulture, for this one has to cross all boundaries of humanity and excel in malicious doctrine of Shaitan. God gave you a big opportunity to live a life that could be free of all BS, but you had a worm in your ass, and finally; you screwed yourself, and I can see you are really good at it.
Whenever you or Farukh look at Tahir, Sarah and Athar, you think of me, because they are me. No matter what you do or say, regardless of where they live, I will always be their mother, and you will always be a father who lied and deceived, and physically and mentally abused their loving and caring mother. You are the one who didn’t let them experience a mother’s love, who is doing everything to keep them away.

The bottom line is, using weak and helpless people is your family legacy, look what you are doing to the poor ignorant people in Jhang. You convince them and influence them in such a way that they think you are their bridge to reach the God; they give you money when they don’t have food to eat at home, you use their daughters and women for labor and sex, and they end up raising your children. You are so selfish that instead of educating them, you would suck every last drop of blood from their weak bodies. You are one of the deadly cancers killing Pakistan; otherwise, it would have been a livable place. I know you feel safe in Pakistan, just like Usama Bin Ladin. It is a good hiding place for people like you.

Here are you clean shaved with your brother, black bearded.

You highjack poor and ignorant people’s minds such that whatever little money they have they give it to you in the name of religion.

Badshah, you and your family could do better than this. When you bring people, who are just like you to their knees, it is the extreme of human indecency and worthlessness for the whole of humanity

This is you, your family with their entourage, all clad in immaculate bright whites.

In front of you, bowing, kneeling and dancing poor, weak and ignorant, whom you call lowlifes giving you whatever money they have_to make you happy… because you put in their minds, if they couldn’t make you happy God will never forgive them.(this is money on the floor given by the people)

At the end of the session, money is being gathered.

I have pondered a lot to find out why you are lacking compassion and warmth to an extent that you will not let your own kids see their mother, not only that, you poisoned their minds by creating hatred for her. When I studied your lifestyle, I found out, this is how you treat every other person. Badshah you failed the purpose of your life. When you go under this earth after your short life, bugs eating your flesh wouldn’t discriminate between you and others you call lowlifes. Beware, that the universe will handover justice to you.

A Hospital Visit.

Just before I was knocked out with propofol, I saw my kids pictures one last time and engraved their images on every part of my brain, Tahir said, “mommy you will be ok”, Sarah said, “don’t worry”, Athar couldn’t verbalize his feelings but I got the message (in my imaginations)

Recovery time, I have no idea……….

Slipping in and out of conciousness, and asking for my kids. 

Thanks to friends and family who didn’t leave my bedside. I am very lucky to have top specialists around me. Yes, they do not work to maintain their social or economic status but the excellence in their fields. Of course, they are paid generously for putting heart, soul and comprehensive knowledge along with manual dexterity on the table.

Badshah your cruel nature has no boundaries!!

Mr. Badshah, You have left me with no options other than using the Internet to communicate with my children. I told you before how important it is for me to contact my kids.
For years, I sent you emails, literally begging, so you would let me have contact with them. You not only ignored them but also lied that I never tried to contact my kids. As it was between you and me, you thought I would not have any proof. No more begging or private mails, everything would be in front of everybody.
I tried Seema Mustafa to know the whereabouts of my kids; she told you and got favors in form of dinners, treats and gifts and “Wah Wah(praises).”  She played a spying  roll very well for some time; one day, she will witness this happening to her own daughter. I believe, what goes around comes around.
I was also in touch with US embassy since the time I got in USA. They did what they could while living in legal boundaries.
When Tahir appeared on the Internet, I tried to contact him, but you were and to this day, are watching him like a hawk. You have all his passwords and monitor all his Internet activities. Whenever I tried to contact him, you would block me or close his account. It seems like he blocks me as it is his account, but Badshah everybody understands that a son would never block his mother who loves him and wants to see him. It is your evil, vindictive and sadistic nature that has no bounders in dark territories.
Yesterday, I sent him a message and today Mr. Badshah you blocked me from his account. Shame on you, Tahir is 19 years old; you should respect him by respecting his privacy. Why is it that you have to know everything, and follow him everywhere? It is your pervert nature to commit such activities, like recording me and my friends’ phone conversations.  Let him use the bathroom; his poop is just like everybody else’s poop; it smells the same and looks the same.
I fear the day when my children get a sneak peek into your twisted and dark mind. If they are not responding to their mothers, it is not because they respect you, or hate you, but  it is because you are a blackmailer and manipulator.

I tried to contact my son, Tahir!!

Yesterday I sent a message and a picture to my son, but Mr. Badshah you blocked me. I do not want to put anything on the Internet, but do I have any other option?image

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Badshah your email address is a Dirty Secret!

Like God works in mysterious ways, corrupt people have their own malicious way, right  Badshah? You tried to destroy me with your secretive and deceptive planning and blamed me for everything. Your double personality is well known to the people close to you, who see you inside the house as well as outside. Beating, insulting and calling names behind closed doors and showing off that Peer sahib image and drama is something you have mastered.

 Today I am going to talk about your email address, one of your dirty secrets. This address is mtayyab123@hotmail.com. I sent you so many emails at this address, I mean countless emails. In those emails I begged you to let me see my kids or at least let me talk to them. The ratio between my emails and yours would be 10-1. In your email you were only interested to know my whereabouts and never gave importance to my pains and requests. In those emails you bluntly denied by saying, “you have nothing to do with them.” You have this email account for quite some time; your’ very first mail I received from this account was when you left for the United States in 2002 leaving me and the kids in Islamabad. You knew your mother was terminal, but it couldn’t stop you. When the whole family came to Pakistan you said, you were going to spend some time with her before her death. Really Badshah!, was that true or you just wanted to leave us there? If you wanted to spend time with her, who stopped you? You left and she died behind you. Anyways, when you were in the USA, you sent me emails from this address the first time. These are just a couple of emails, but enough to show for how long you have it. I am pasting a few emails from around that time which will explain how I got your new email address;Above email is one of many emails I sent you Badshah. In the following email your response was; “you don’t need to worry about these things….. You carefully crafted the sentence to avoid any future damage. Acknowledging or leaving proof that you abducted these kids and now keeping them from me would be the last thing you want to do. Around that time you also got busted when your second wife Farukh found out that you were still communicating with me, therefore, you needed a new account.

 This is how I got your second email address; mtb.s@hotmail.com I got the email, but was not sure about the sender so I asked you a couple of questions regarding kids to determine your identity, but it was enough to piss you (Peer Sahib) off, and you did not reply for a long time. Your response was the following email. (Notice the spelling and punctuation errors that are made intentionally to throw the readers off track)

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In July 22, 2013 when US embassy, on my behalf, performed welfare visit on Sarah and Athar, you’re evil and wicked intentions were oozing from your every orifice as it always had been in the past. On my behalf, the embassy personnel told you that the mother wants to see and talk to her kids. You very cleverly said that, why she doesn’t contact me directly, she has my email address. When the embassy confirmed, you gave them the address I never had. It was “badshahm@hotmail.com.” You didn’t give them the address through which we had been and still are in correspondence. When I received a welfare visit report via email and on the phone, I came to know that Mr. Badshah seemed to have no problem with anything whatsoever. I knew right away this was nothing but his malicious intention. Following is the email correspondence between me and the state department.

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Now, this badshahm@hotmail.com was new to me. I explained to ‘The Department of State with Office of Children Issues’ what actually was happening behind closed doors. Anyways, it was suggested to me, and also appropriate to send you an email as you said so. The Department of State suggested me to send you emails on the address I already had, and keep them posted. I sent emails at “mtb.s@hotmail.com” and “mtayyab123@hotmail.com.” I also sent carbon copies of those emails to the State Department. My email to “mtb.s@hotmail.com” bounced back with “postmaster’s failure to deliver notification.” It meant this was not active anymore; since it didn’t fulfill the purpose of secret communication, you closed it. Your other address” mtayyab123@hotmail.com.” was valid and active, because it successfully received my email. I notified the Department of State and explained what was going on. Now, why you did it?? I’ll tell you Peer Sahib, why you did it, you want to pretend I never contacted you regarding my kids, and if I tell somebody about the email correspondence you and I had, and are still having, you will lie shamelessly that you never had this address, and that she is lying. This is your nature Badsha, taking me away from the real world, and then persecute and humiliate me. This is the reason you didn’t mention this address to the embassy. Still, you think I am your slave. Even after divorce, in your mind you can’t free me. Isn’t it hard Badshah? I totally get it. You are like, she, a low cast woman, used to be under my shoes…. how dare opens her mouth. 

On September 13. 2013, I received an email from you (off the record) account, ” mtayyab123@hotmail.com.”  again with threatening, insulting and filthy language, but it didn’t hurt me, I am who I am. The only thing that hurt me is your statement, “…. stay away from my kids…….. Anybody can see that email along your other mails in above snipped pictures of my email Inbox (I used snipping tools just to show the actual mails)

It is obvious Badshah that this email address is one of your many dirty secrets. You hurt  me, and have already caused a lot of irreversible damage to Tahir, Sarah and Athar, they can’t see their mother who loves them and waiting for them. The truth is, that in your greed, ego and delusions you have shoved your head into your a*s, and now your comprehension is limited to that poopy filter that has covered your eyes. Of course, this is not what you want people to know, shame on you and your brother Peer Habib Badshah, who crafted the heinous crime of snatching three innocent kids from a loving and caring mother so that you can marry another woman.

Tahir and me in a dream!

Tahir, I saw you in my dream! In that dream, we have a big living room, big enough to accommodate a car along with everything that is part of a living room. You had your red sports car flipped over, and doing something like fixing it or whatever I called you from the kitchen, but you didn’t answer. I called you again, but you remained quiet. I entered the living room; you were standing by the front bumper closer to the passenger-side wheel. You were wearing a gray sweatshirt, and your hands were dirty. I called you for the third time, really loud this time. You turned your head toward me while lifting your right hand about six inches and said, “mommy, I heard_I am busy, let me finish this.” I said, “you think this car will run again.” Next moment, I heard loud engine sounds and woke up. Love you Tahir Sarah and Ather.

Badshah, delusion is your only option

Badshah, from your e-mail, from hotmail account “mtayyab123@hotmail.com” you once again confirmed that you have mastered the filthy language, which explains; it is an inherent property of a Pakistani Peer saab. It didn’t surprise me at all I spent so many days and night with your verbal and physical abuse.

I am sure one day you will say, ”I don’t even have this e-mail account, she is lying” because you are just a coward and evil back stabber, who controls only weak and poor people, women and children, yes Badshah, you attack and hide to avoid consequences. You can’t live in USA, as we have very strong justice system here. Here  you are a proven culprit, and you know it. Badshah, how you could sleep at night after snatching my kids from me. Shame on you, and your entourage. You do not have a speck of conscience; that is how you sleep and terrorize me and the kids. 

If my family is wrong, I would say, “they are wrong.” I know nobody is perfect. But, according to you, your family can’t make any mistake whatsoever. You also believe, Tahir, Sarah and Athar are only your children, and I have nothing to do with that… Wah Peer saab, delusion has engulfed you completely, and delusion along with your stubbornness shows that you will go all the way down. Lies, deception, superficiality is not your style, IT IS YOUR LIFE. I never thought, I would ever right or say anything about your family members you didn’t actively participate in abducting my children and confiscating my documents, but your abusive language for my family is provoking me to write what your two sisters, Bushra and one, who is Farrukh’s sister in law did before marriage. Of course, I will write your relationship with Gurhiya, and that all will completely define the term “Illegitimate child” for you and your mureeds. 

Tahir, Sarah and Athar, don’t let all that negative energy hold you back, slow you down or make you feel inferior. I completely understand how you are feeling. Keep in mind that this is a temporary phase; therefore don’t let it shackle you forever. What I mean is, don’t let this affect you in any shape or form. Everybody is special, when we say this, it means he or she is born with certain features and in certain environments on which they have no control over. It happens to all of us, like we can’t choose our parents, most importantly their attitude. We have to live with them because as children, we are vulnerable and have no other option. If you look around you, you will see this everywhere.

Ok, this part can’t be changed, and the good thing is, this is not the whole picture, it is just the part of a picture. Luckily, we all are born with tools that can be and should be used to better the picture and keep it in a tip top shape. Also, if you don’t use your tools, you will never learn to use them, and after some time they will become rusted. The most amazing and intricate tool we all have is our brain, which among other things, needs positive environment. Ok, I understand you don’t have the positive environment, well! Let’s create it for us, or at least try to create it; every person in this world has good habits and bad habits, it means that people give you happiness or sadness. Not a single person on this earth is all good or all bad, and realistically, we should not expect it. You will see that people expect perfection from others while hiding their own shortfalls; it means they pretend that they are perfect. This leads to hypocrisy, it means pretending what someone is not and then lying to cover up the facts or situations that weren’t there to begin with, or were not socially or for any other reason acceptable. We were talking about an amazing tool called the brain, which enabled us to tame the beasts, discover the planets and harvest the atomic power, and much more. We are not going that far, for now, let’s start from the basics.

My lovely kidos, whenever somebody says something to you or you hear something, do not jump to conclusion, or fall into depression. If you think, you will find different facets of one situation, then I would recommend going with the one that  has more positive inclinations and is logically acceptable. Even in the harshest situation, breathe and tell yourself, “I will take care of it.” Listen, you have what Albert Einstein and president Obama have, and that is will power, logic and brain. So, have faith in yourself. I know sometimes the situation is hostile and it is hard to change, but stand tall, be there yourself, the truth and for me .Time will fly by. For the time being, every day before falling asleep, close your eyes and feel my hand on your left cheek and the warmth of my chest on your right one. I will close my eyes, press my chin on your head and say, “I love you.”

I miss my kids!

Tahir, Sarah, Athar, my loves, I miss you and always think about you. Remember, I am not far from you. Physically, yes, but remember, you are parts of my soul; my soul was split when I gave birth to you. Yes meri jaan, you are my soul, closer to me than my breaths. One day, I may lose my breath and this body too, but the bond you and I have will stay as strong as it ever was. Badshah, you can keep our bodies apart but not our hearts and souls. You want to own and rule bodies; you can do this, but keep in mind that I have their hearts and soul. When their pain is unbearable, and the pillow is unable to hold more tears, guess who they think about? They think about me, their mother. I know, it was never enough for your ego and sadistic nature and nobody’s physical or mental pain could ever affect your evil decisions.

Remember in 2002 when you called my father and said, “Come, and get your daughter otherwise I will kick her out.”

Yes they did say, “We are coming.”

After that you threw a yellow large envelope at me and said, “This is what you brought with you from your parents’ home, take it and get out of here.”Your exact words in Urdu were, “YEH TUM APNE BAAP KE GHAR SE LE KER AIE THE, YEH LO AUR YAHAN SE DAFA HO JAO.” When my parents came, you and your sister didn’t say a word, only your followers were there to talk. Now why would I or my parents talk to them? They were outsiders for us. Most importantly I was your wife and conflict was between you and me They had no Idea what was going on behind the walls and how to solve it, They were vocalizing few sentences you put in their mouthsYour brother, Habib didn’t show up, well he was not supposed to show up; he knew that he would get this work done without getting his hands dirty with the help of his bootlickers. He controlled everything over the telephone; you both knew what you were doing, and played very well that “cop bad cop game.”

You only once came to me and said, “don’t try to go close to these kids, if you do, I have men ready to take care of that.” You were pointing towards the attached servant quarter where six to seven men were sitting, some armed with guns. After some time you called Khalid, the driver and asked him to drop me and my parents at the bus station. You DID NOT say once, “stay”. Why would you? When getting rid of me was your aim. You had to get rid of me in order to marry Farukh. I was also told by one of your servants about a sick conversation between you and your sick brother about the green card. Your brother advised you that under no circumstances should I get the Green card. And this is exactly what you did. On my third day in Lahore while I was with my parents, I came to know Sarah was very sick. I called you and your sister Habib Fatima picked up the phone and told me to call in the evening if I wanted to talk to you.

I called that night and said, “I can’t live without my kids.”

You said, “Kids are fine and they don’t need you.”

I said, “I am coming tomorrow.” You said, “No, No, No, you can’t.”

I said,” Nobody can stop me from coming,”

You said, “I’ll see how you’ll come here.”

After that you repeated three times, “I divorce you.” “I divorce you.” “I divorce you.” 

You continued, “now I will see how you will come here.”

Here you double crossed me and my kids. This verbal divorce was between you and me, you hid it from people, instead kept telling them that you were trying to compromise with me but I was the one who didn’t want to come and be with kids. This way you were protecting your Peer Image and gaining sympathy as a pious and battered man. Mr. Badshah I have only two words to describe you and those are “pure evil.”

When you were fed up with me you started physically and verbally abusing me by calling me names such as whore etc. meanwhile you had your eyes on Farukh. Badshah you have a very predictable pattern and that is as follows: Whenever you find new women the active women in your life all of a sudden becomes a whore. Before me there was Guriya who also became a whore after pleasing you…., remember Guriya, Fari’s sister and Munawar’s sister in law, they are your mureeds from Gujranwala, they lived in New York and you stayed with them. I will write in detail some other time, but, Good job Peer Saab. The bottom line is, you can’t snatch children from a mother and then blame her for everything going wrong in the world. It is time to grow up. Be a man enough to admit and fix your mistakes. It will save so many lives. These lives are not those of just anybody, those are of, Tahir, Sarah and Athar. 

Badshah, because you don’t let the kids talk to me and communicating with them is essential, I don’t give damn about privacy. Since, I don’t have kids with me, I have nothing to lose.

Control Freak

Badshah, I have a question for you! Why controlling others is so important to you? Have you ever questioned to yourself? You go extra miles to implement your ideology by stalking, lying, abusing, and manipulating your demented goals. What I understand is that you have a strategy. First, you let others know, what you want and then keep reminding them continuously, sometimes through jokes. You include your family members, friends and your followers which are very important for your standpoint, as it makes you more credible and less guilty. It is also vital for your-self proclaimed respect and delusion, and easy to have in Pakistani Peer Culture, where Bootlicking is the foremost responsibility of the followers. In Urdu it is called,”peer saab ki neni chodi karna.” After letting people know, what makes you happy, by all means, you keep tabs on them, like you discreetly record phone conversations, keep track of car mileage, and monitor all internet activities. Humiliating, calling names, mockery and hatred are part of the game, depending on who is being dealt. After stalking, there comes the stage of satisfaction or punishment, satisfaction is for you if things are going accordingly, and punishment is for the person who disobeys you. Punishment involves serious talk, humiliation, physical and mental torture. You with shitty counseling of Habib Badshah would do whatever it takes to punish a person. You would take a person forcefully to such a place where control is feasible with support from people like you. What place on the earth could be better than a lawless country like Pakistan; there people like you can find all the ingredients that are necessary to cook a dirty dish. I was taken to Pakistan because, I protested against your physical and mental abuse. You knew you wouldn’t be able to play this dirty game in USA for long, as I had started talking to my doctors about it. Remember when my doctor in the Winthrop University Hospital talked to you about it…. It didn’t end well, you kicked the crap out of me and I ended up calling 911. It is on the record Badshah, and in no way, in your favor. Along the way, to make things worse you started drooling for other woman Farrukh. Wah peer saab Wah, Habib Badshah screwed you badly. Amongst the stuff you left in Mirza family ’ garage, I found a video cam for PC. You never owned one while living with me and the kids. You only bought it when you were away from us to have a video chat with Farrukh . The other thing is you never had a video chat with me or the kids during that time, so the only logical conclusion is you bought that for your mistress whom you were about to marry. Now, how can you accuse me, “you left me and the kids, and that is why I married her.” According to you, it is all my fault, I never cooked for you and the kids according to your statement in the divorce paper. I went to Pakistan with you, and over there, I forced you to steal my green card, Social security card, driving ID and passport, then I forced you to call my parents and tell them to come and take me with them otherwise you would kick me out. Once I was gone, coincidently just like all other things Farukh, happened to be there, all ready to marry you, CUT THIS CRAP! You got what you wanted, but the thing is you could have it in a right way, and that makes all the difference in the world. These kids don’t deserve to live without their mother. I really feel bad for Tahir, Sarah ,and Athar, people dream about getting education in USA, and these poor kids are so unlucky that after being born here can’t reap the benefits. Remember, how desperate you were to come to USA; you got a SIFARISHI letter from Ghulam Mustafa Jatoi the acting prime minister to get student visa for the U.S. Now, Tahir, Sarah and Athar do not deserve the best education in the world only because their father’s ego and hypocritical views are important more than anything else.